Rest Your Bones
by Neverbetterx3
Summary: Edward left Bella, leaving her to wallow in the arms of Jacob Black. After falling in love with him, she loses track of life & decides to leave Forks and return to Arizona. What happens when she returns to Forks after three years? Has Jacob moved on?
1. Regret

_Welcome to "Rest your bones". Before reading, please keep in mind I don't have a beta reader and I am by no means a professional writer. However, if you find yourself feeling as though I am not portraying a character correctly, do come to me about it. Nicely, of course. I enjoy constructive criticism. I also appreciate you taking time to read this. I hope you enjoy. Comment if you do!_

_**Side note: This is set toward the middle of New Moon, after Edward left and the bond between her and Jacob had formed. In this story Renee stayed in Arizona. Why? Cuz I like Arizona =]**  
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"_It's one hundred and nine degrees_

_in this crowded room,_

_no room to breathe_

_with walls as cold as a gallery,_

_this is no place for me." _

**- 'Think of you' by A Fine Frenzy**

**Bella's POV:**

"I'll see you tomorrow." I called out to Chris, a co-worker of mine, over my shoulder as I exited the diner I have been working at for two year now. Two years too long. And it never failed, that every time I hopped into Renee's Jeep, I wished for my old, beaten up, red truck. I never thought it'd be possibly for me to miss Forks, but I did. More then I could have ever imagined. Although I was confident in my reason for leaving, I had fought the urge to go back so many times in the last three years. Not only did I miss the little town and my accent truck, I missed my laid-back dad. Sure, I had grown up with my mom, and I loved having her around, but I had so much in common with Charlie and I missed the bonding.

But the one thing I missed most, was Jacob. He called me several times, every day for the entire first year after I left. He wrote me letters I never opened and just continuously shoved under my bed to avoid. I didn't want to hurt Jacob, and I knew that if I answered the phone or replied to any of his letters that I'd just make things worse and defeat the purpose of me moving back her in the first place.

Renee would beg and plead with me to "call that poor boy back" or "write him something, at least letting him know that I am alive and well", but as someone had once done for me, I wanted to make it a clean break, at least until I gathered myself and knew again what I wanted out of life. I wanted to be fair to Jacob, and back then I didn't know what fair was. So, I left. Little did I know that I'd spend three years "_gathering myself_".

Lately I'd pick up the phone and begin dialing Jacob's number, just to slam it down before I could finish. When I'd occasionally speak to Charlie, I'd ask about Jacob, and Jacob would in turn ask about me, but Charlie hadn't really had anything to say about Jacob in months. What if he had forgotten about me? Or moved on? I felt bad for now not knowing anything about my once-best friend.

As I pulled into the drive way of the place I now called home, I frowned. I took nothing with me from Charlie's house in Forks. Just my a few of my clothes and my laptop. I figured it was best to come here with as little as possible and start anew when I arrived. I regreted that decision now. I longed for my purple comforter, my journal, a picture of Jacob or any of my Fork friends. Well maybe not any. A picture of the Cullen's might be to painful to look at, even now. I had, however, learned to say his and his families names without wincing, over the years, and I was proud of that fact.

Now Jacob's name brought more pain then any of theirs did. Probably because I was the one to leave him and not the other way around.

I entered the air conditioned house with relief from the outside heat. I never had to worry about that in Forks. It was mostly overcast and rainy. And though I had hated that when I first arrived there, it had grown on me quickly.

"Bella?" my mom's voice called for me from another room.

"Yeah, mom?" I had called her dad for the first month or so that I was here, she never appreciated that.

"Come here for a sec." I fallowed her voice, only to find her in the kitchen, sitting on a stool, hunched over a microwaveable dinner. Her cooking was just as bad, if not worse then Charlie's.

"What's up?" I greeted her.

"How was work?" she asked, the same question she asked every day the moment I walked in.

"Same as always. I lose a little more faith in humanity everyday." I shook my head at the memory of customers from earlier that day.

"Aw, baby. Don't say that. Not everyone's that horrible."

"Nope, just the ones that come into the diner." I sighed, causing Renee to smirk. "Well, I have some news that might to cheer you up."

"What's that? Poison to slip into rude customer's food?" I joked.

"Not quite, but I know how excited you get when I say that I heard from your father." She was right, my mood was cheered almost instantly.

"Annndd?"

"And he said he wants you to call him back when you get a chance and that he misses you '_Bells_'." she smiled. I bit my lip to keep it from quivering. I had never realized just how much I missed hearing my father call me Bells til now.

"Thanks." I said quickly, darting past Renee to retrieved the phone.

As soon as it was in my possession I bolted for my room, shutting the door behind me. I flopped down on the bed I've had since I was thirteen and dialed Charlie's number faster then I thought my clumsy fingers could move.

**Ring one - **_I hope he's home. _

**Ring two- **_Maybe he's out fishing. _

**Ring three- **_Please pick up. _

**Ring four- **"Hello?"

"Dad!" I exclaimed.

"Hey Bells, I'm so glad you called." I could hear the smile in his voice and I imagined the light wrinkles and laugh lines that appeared around it.

"How are you? How have you been?" It had only been a week since I'd last heard from him, but a week was far too long.

"I'm doing well, just got home from a very uneventful day at work. How are you? How's work been?" he asked.

"Oh same-o, same-o. Rude people, runny eggs, coming home with the fresh smell of grease and bacon on my skin and hair. You know, all that fun stuff."

Charlie chuckled, "Good to hear."

"You said work was uneventful?" I was curious about the crime rate in Forks since I had left. Uneventful only meant that Edward had always been right, I was the danger magnet. Everything bad seemed to stop when I wasn't around.

"Yeah, not even so much as an animal attack around these parts."

"Well at least that means you're safe." I smiled.

"Always am." he confirmed. "So, you been up to anything besides working, lately? Hanging out with friends at all?" I could hear slight concern in his voice.

Charlie wanted to see if maybe my life was a little better, and that my zombie days in Forks had gone since being here. He asked me this at least once every conversation and my answer was always the same, to his dismay.

"Nah, just working." I heard Charlie sigh. "I have, however, been thinking about a certain friend a lot recently. Have you happened to see or hear from Jacob at all lately?"

Charlie took in a breath. Not a good sign.

"That's actually part of the reason I called. Billy Black stopped by for a visit yesterday and he brought Jacob with him. I swear that boy gets bigger every time I see him. And his hair, it's growing out again." Charlie went on, my eyes beginning to water.

"How is he? Is he doing ok? Did he ask about me?" the words shot from my mouth faster then I could think.

"Welp, he didn't ask, but I told him I had heard from you. I think he would have asked if he didn't have a lady-friend with him."

I felt a sharp blow to my gut

. "A. ." I swallowed the building lump in my throat, "A '_lady-friend_'?" I had to force it from my lips.

"Aw, Bells. I wouldn't have said anything if I had known it was going to bother you this much. Anyway, she's probably just a friend. Her name's Leah, she's Harry Clearwater's daughter. She's a nice girl, very pretty, but she isn't you." I had to commend Charlie for trying.

"Thanks dad, but it's ok." I fought to hide the apparent sadness in my voice as tears gathered in my eyes. "I'm happy for him. He's moved on and that's great. After all, I couldn't expect him to wait for me. Not after how I've treated him."

"Oh Bells. Please don't cry. I'm sorry I even mentioned it. I just thought you'd want to know. I'm so sorry, hunny." Charlie comforted me.

"It's ok. I'll be alright. And you're right. I would have wanted to know, regardless. It's fine, I promise." I tried for a smile.

"But like I said Bells, they could be just friends. I just didn't think it was my place to ask. Look, maybe you should give him a call. I am sure he'd be happy to hear from you. Girlfriend or not. You still have his number, right?"

"I do, but I think it's best to just leave it be. No sense in me popping back into his life now. I'll get over it. "

"Are you sure, Bella? I really do think you should try . ." my dad's sentence was interrupted by the sound of his doorbell ringing faintly in the background. "Op, crap. He's here early. Sorry Bells, it's Harry with some of his famous fish fry. Can I give you a call when we're threw with dinner?"

A small amount of disappointment shot through me.

"Oh, okay. Um, yeah. Call me back. Enjoy your dinner and tell Harry I said hello."

"Will do. I'll try and get something out of him about his daughter and Jacob and let you know. I'll talk to you in a bit, bye Bells."

"Thanks dad, bye." and with that I reluctantly hung up the phone.

I laid back on my bed and stared at the ceiling, my mind wondering. Envisioning _my_ Jacob holding hands with some Native beauty. Tan skin, tall, thin, gorgeous. My stomach turned. I had always said that he deserved so much better then me and maybe he had finally found it.

I rolled over and set my cheek to the very edge of the side of my bed, feeling the coolness of the untouched fabric on my face, my watery eyes closed. I needed comforting and the person who was best at doing so was a million miles away, with some other girl probably resting her head on the spot on his shoulder that used to be for me.

Tears streamed fast down my face. Curious as to where they were landing I opened my eyes and looked to the wooden floor where peeking out, only slightly, was the tip of a white envelope. I reached out and pulled the rest of the hidden letter from under my bed, bringing it closer to my face.

The bold ink letters stared back at me, my name so far from his where it sat on the return address. I moved it toward my chest, holding the last letter Jacob ever wrote me close to my heart. I swore I could feel the warmth of his hands still on the thick paper.

I know I shouldn't read it. It would only make this sadness worse, but would it mention Leah? I found myself itching to know. Had he ended his letters with finality? Or one day just decide to stop writing?

I looked at the intimidating piece of stationary and debating opening it. If I opened this one, I knew I'd end up opening the rest. And was I really ready for that? I had spent all these years winning over temptation to peek inside each one. Was I ready now to just let that all go to waste?

But deep down inside, more then anything, I wanted to know. . needed to know what he had said to me. Maybe reading these would make it easier to let him go? Or harder. Who was I kidding, it didn't matter now.

My finger found it's way into the envelope, quickly yanking one long rip in the fold of the paper, removing the sloppily folded letter slowly, careful not to tear it. As I eyed the heavily creased paper, certain words popped out at me.

_Don't read it, Isabella. You'll regret it_, I said to myself. But I was to far gone.

I began reading:

**Dear Bella, **

**I've written you fifty-two letters, called you several times a day in the past year and have gotten nothing in return. You win, I give up. I can't keep caring and waiting on you and be expected to live a normal life. So, consider this my last letter. I won't call or write to you anymore. From now on I'm going to leave you alone to go about your business. If you never return to Forks, I wish you well in life and hope that you find something along the road that makes you happy, because obviously that something wasn't me. Take care of yourself, Bella. **

**-Jacob**

I could feel the long forgotten hole in my chest, begin to reopen as I began to sob. The words he wrote were so harsh, to final, but could I blame him? His hand writing was so bold, etched into the paper with frustration. I felt so terrible.

Immediately I bent over to reach under my bed, using both hands to retrieve two large handfuls of unread letters. I thumbed through the load determined to find the first one he sent, wanting to read them all in chronological order. As soon as I found it, I ripped it open and began reading.

An hour and a half had passed and I had read every letter in the pile. My mind now flooded with news, gossip and the pain Jacob had described in each letter. The hole in my chest had stretched to almost an unbearable size, my eyes blinded by tears.

How could I have done that to Jacob? I never knew I had hurt him as much as he had written on each page. I realized then that I had done to him as Edward had done to me. I had become Edward. I knew what if felt like to be Jacob, and I was the one who had made him feel that way. How could I?

Suddenly I had a confidence in me I never felt before. I had to contact Jacob. There were no if's and's or but's, I had to hear his thick, husky voice. I had to tell him how sorry I was. He had to know.

Before I knew it the phone was yet again in my palm, the feeling of sweat filled my hand. I hesitated as I always had before, watching the numbers as though they'd dial themselves. I hovered my thumb over the "talk" button, betting years would pass before it touched down onto it. But before my skin could reach the plastic the phone rang, startling me.

The caller ID read: "_Charlie Swan"_. I quickly answered.

"Hey Dad." It came out rushed, but I knew what I was about to do.

"Hey Bells, something wrong?" Charlie sounded really concerned.

"No, nothing wrong, but I have a sort of surprise." I had finally decided on something I had wanted to do for years.

"What's that, dear?", curiosity thick in his words.

"Well, I'm sorry it's taken me so long to do this, but. ." I paused, making sure I was stil breathing, I had lost track.

"But what, Bells? Is everything ok?"

"Dad, I'm coming home."


	2. Replacement

Alright, sorry for the large amount of time between chapters. I've had alot going on and I've been trying to figure out where I want to go with this. I'm still not completely sure. For the longest time I couldn't find Jacob's voice/personality. Only because I've been feeling very 'Bella-like' lately lol. So if you feel I am not conducting Jacob properly, let me know. I'm always up for some constructive criticism. I might end up going in and changing a few things around. If so, I'll update you. Sorry if it isn't completely edited. It takes a few times of reading it to get all the kinks out. Thanks for reading! Please review and let me know how I'm doing!

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_"I think of you, whever life gets me down._

_I think of you, whenever you're not around."_

**-'Think of you' ; A Fine Frenzy**

**Jacob's POV:**

Have you ever woken up in a mood where you just want to be left alone? I did today. All beacuase of a dream I had. A dream about _her_. It happens every so often and it always puts me in a bad mood for the remainder of the day.

And it doesn't help when you're surrounded by a pack of imature half-wolf boys.

"So what's the deal with you and Leah, anyway?" Quil asked before taking a bite of one of Emily's delicious muffins.

"For the millionth time man, nothing is going on between us. Leah and I are just friends." I had argued this with every guy in our pack several times now.

"Well '_nothing_' isn't what it looks like." Paul added, taking a seat next to me at the table.

"Does Leah know it's nothing? If not, you might want to inform her. Leading Leah on isn't something I'd recomend doing." said Sam with a slight smile. Out of all us guys, Sam would know best. After all, once upon a time he did date her.

"Why don't you give Leah a chance, Jacob? Both of you have had tough times with relationships. Perhaps you are what eachother need." Emily came up behind me, resting her hand softly on my shoulder.

"Beacause Em, I just . can't." She knew why, they all did. As a wolf, it was hard to keep anything to yourself. I often found the whole telepathy thing was more of a curse then a gift. I never had any secrets. The pack knew everything there was to know about me, and I about them.

"Yeah Em, '_He just can't_'." Paul said mockingly. "He can't because he's still hooked on that Bella chick. Look cry-boy, it's been three years, man. She's not coming back. You haven't heard from her the entire time she's been gone. Get over it. She doesn't care, and neither should you. There are other pieces of tail out there, better looking ones. Open your eyes, dude." Paul lextured.

I looked around at the other faces in the room, all with an "o" shaped mouth, ready for me to react. To launch at his throat and fight the urge to phase and kill him infront of everyone. But instead I just sat there and took it.

"He's right." I confessed. I knew I had written to many letters, waited by the phone to many hours and kept hoping for too many years. I was way over due. I needed to move on. And maybe Emily was right, maybe things with Leah could progress? Maybe one day I could see her as more then just a cool girl to hang out with.

The room stayed silent for a few seconds, all eyes on me. More then likely waiting for my calm exterier to break and for me lash out at Paul. But I didn't.

"So. . " Emily began, breaking the silence."Does that mean you'll take Leah out?" her eyebrow raised, "On a real date?"

What could it hurt? "Sure, sure." I agreed.

"Swweeet." said Embry hitting my back firmly with his open palm as he walked by.

I could feel regret already welling up inside of me, but I knew I'd have to turn my cheek to it. This was me trying to live a normal life, to try and 'date around like any other healthy young man my age', as my dad put it. But I couldn't help but get the feeling that I was going to do the wrong thing.

xxxx

After finishing up breakfast at Emily's I drove my Rabbit twenty minutes down into Forks to one of only a handful of mechanics the most northern part of the Pacific Northwest had to offer.

Ever since Forks lost it's problem-prone citizen, the packs nightly patroling became a big ole waste of time. That being the case, at a meeting we had months back Sam announced that our nightly strolls (which is what they were lately) around the Rez would be fewer. It's taken me those few months to sleep, be lazy and then final realize that a job would be something I might look into.

As I pulled into "Shade Tree Mechanics" I swallowed the nervous lump in my throat and kissed my unruley, irresponsible teenage days goodbye.

xxxx

I left the auto shop with my head high and a good feeling in my gut. It was a nice, knowing you were going to be paid for your talent, not to mention something you enjoyed doing. I couldn't wait to get home to tell dad.

Now I headed home in order to soak up some z's before going to the usual, boring night on the town.

I drove a tad slower on the trip to LaPush, giving me time to think, to think about my future, about how nice it'll be to help my dad with bills, grocereies and then have a little left over cash to spend on whatever my heart desired.

I began making a mental list of what I could possibly buy with my newly found income.

The first thing that popped into my head was a radio for my Rabbit. The silence in here was eery when I didn't have a passenger to keep me company.

Next on my list would be a new wardrobe. I had needed one of those for a while now, I just never have the spare money to replace all the clothes I had destroyed midtransformation.

My mind wondered, trying to think of other things to spend some cash on. I was never much of a wanting person when it came to material items. The only thing I'd ever asked for money was for car parts. Other then that, I never found the need for anything fancy or expensive.

What could I spend my money on? Or maybe I should be asking who? I realized now that if I did actually take Leah on a date, I could pay not only myself, but for her as well and not have to worry about buming some cash from my dad. That was releaving. But was I really going to go through with this whole Leah thing?

In that second my attention as drawn to a red light on my dash bored. I needed gas. How had I not noticed before it got to this point? To distracted. To much was going on in this large head of mine.

I pulled into the local gas station and killed the engine, quickly hoping out and heading inside the general store to pay for the pump. The door chimed as I entered and nodded at a kid I went to school with who was behind the counter.

"What's up dude? How's life?" I never real spoke to this guy, I couldn't even remember his name, so I was sure he was at a loss for mine.

"It's life. How about you, man? You like working here?" I wasn't the best at making small talk, but I had to learn sometime.

"Eh, it pays the bills."

I handed him the money and told him the pump number and as he wrung me up something to the right of the counter caught my eye. It was a brass braclet, made for someone with a much more petite wrist then mine, and hanging from it was a small coppery dream catcher, much like the one I had made Bella for her birthday.

"Something catch your eye?" my once classmate spoke.

"Just this. Reminds me of someone." I picked it up and examined it closer. The price tag staring me in the face. My mind went back to my previous thoughts of what I would use my money for when I started my job, and I realized then who I wanted to spend it on.

Bella.

My stomach dropped at the thought of all the things in that very mini mart that I could buy her, that I thought she'd appreciate. All the dates we could go on. All the movies I could treat her to. The possibilities were endless, if only she were here. I sighed and placed the braclet back where I found it.

"Thanks man." I said, taking the reciet from the kids hand.

"Sure thing, dude. You take care." He sounded as though he wasn't ever going to see me again.

"Yeah, you too."

If I were smart I'd do something constructive with my money. Save until I had enough for a flight to Pheniox. To be like the guys in books or movies and take charge and head out after there woman. But then again, she wasn't mine. Never was. I was so close though!

I clinched my first and almost hit my car as I approched it. I need to stop this. To stop being a moody little boy and do as Paul said and get over it. It was messing me up, had been for way to long. And she was probably dating someone else, I probably never even crossed her mind.

I slammed the pump into my gas tank and pulled the trigger, vowing to myself that I'd try everything in my power from that moment on to never think about Bella again, only knowing that that was something I could never do. No matter what I did.

xxxx

The gravel crunched under my Rabbit as I drove into the driveway of my home, Leah's sent filling my nose the moment I steped out of the driver's side door.

God, I hope Emily or one of the boys didn't tell her about earlier. I didn't need to open the door and see her eager face awaiting a date invitation. Not tonight.

As I walked through the threshold I saw Leah and my father plastered to the screen. Some sports game, I'm sure. Sometimes I wondered if Leah was more of a guy then I was.

"Hey Jake!" Leah's eyes lit up when they made contact with mine. Was she always this happy to see me?

"Hey Leah. What are you doing here?" I scratched at my neck.

"I thought maybe we could hang out before patroling tonight. Watch a movie or something?" she stood from the couch and strolled toward me.

"As fun as that sounds, some of us haven't had the pleasure of sleeping in all day, Leah. Some of us had to go out and get a job."

"You got it!" she was more excited then I was.

"I did."

"Of course you did! I knew you would!" she flung her arms around my tightly.

"Congradulations son! I'm proud of you." I heard my dad say over Leah's shoulder.

"Thanks, dad." I said, patting Leah's back awkwardly. I wasn't used to affection. Exspecially from Leah.

And then she did something even more unexpected.

She pushed me away, only slightly, and planted one hard, pressure filled kiss on my mouth.

I could do nothing about the situation. It had happened to fast and plus, I was in shock. Frozen in place. My lips still unable to move from where her lips had set them.

"We should celebrate!" Leah darted toward the kitchen.

"Well son, I'd say Leah likes you a little more then I thought." My dad chuckled as soon as Leah was out of hearing rang, though I knew she could still hear everything.

"Yeah." I wiped at my mouth, as though it would clear the kiss away. "Me too."

I moved to fallow Leah, only to see what her idea of celebrating was.

As I entered the kitchen I looked to see her bent over, peering into the refridgerator. Her ass sticking out toward me, clad in her tiny, tight shorts she always wore.

If I were like anyone else in our pack of deliquents I would have sat and stared at the view, but unlike the others, I was taught better then that.

Sort of.

When Leah was threw raiding my fridge she popped out from behind the door with two cans of what my dad and Charlie liked to call "vitamin R". Beer. A huge grin plastered on her face.

She was a pretty girl, I'll give her that. And I bet she'd clean up a whole lot nicer. I imagined she could be considered gorgeous, if she tried. There'd be something wrong with me if I didn't find her at least attractive, but yet, I felt nothing but friendship for her. Why?

"Here ya go, Jacob." She tossed one at me. "Drink up! You're employeed now. Better enjoy this while you can." Leah snaped her can open and gulped down a few chugs.

I eyed the can, debating whether or not to down the thing in one shot or not drink it at all.

"What's wrong?" Leah's happy expression was replaced with that of concern.

"Nothing's wrong, I've just had a long day. I'm beat." I cracked open my can and chugged it until it was empty.

Leah smiled at me.

"Well, I guess if you're all that tired, sissy boy, I'll leave you to sleep." She walked toward me and the only thing I could hope was that she wasn't expecting a kiss goodnight.

"You owe me a movie night though. I'll bring "Die Hard" over tomorrow evening ok?"

"Sure, sure." I agreed. "And Leah?"

"Yeah?"

"Please try not to think about that kiss you decided to plant on me tonight. I don't need anymore flack from any of the guys, okay?" I lightly pleaded.

"Of course, Jake. I'll try. It'll be our little secret." She said, sounding oddly seductive as she winked and departed from the kitchen and my house all together.

Oh lord, I thought.

I sighed and pulled my hand thought my hair.

"Good luck with that." My dad's voice startled me as he rolled on past.


End file.
